Miracle on 37th street!

Today started like any other Friday. Pressed snooze about 3 times. Rolled out of bed. Ate some oatmeal squares. Got on facebook. Jumped in the shower and then into a snug pair of jeans. Off to work with wet hair. No clue how excited and perplexed I would be just a few hours later. Work was slow, the office seemed empty. I couldn't focus. Just one thing I wanted to know. Where was my cycle? When was I going to start? 10.5 weeks since my last lupron shot. I thought for sure I'd be back on the baby making train by now even though the Dr.'s office assured me that it could take up to 12 weeks to get my body back. Taunted by ridiculous thoughts, I decided to quiet my mind by proving to myself that I was NOT pregnant and my cycle WOULD return. So, I went outside and jumped in my frozen car which took me to the nearest dollar store. No pregnancy tests. Tons of ovulation predictor tests. UGH! Jumped back in frozen car and went to the nearest drug store. Grabbed the cheapest off brand test I could find. Picked up lunch. Drove back to work. Went to my 2nd office (private one stall bathroom) and did my thing. Stick placed gently on counter. Waited. Watched the dark blue vertical control line appear. OK. Stared at the horizontal blue line in the test window. Waited. A faint vertical line slowly appeared in the test window, making a plus sign. Thoughts: Maybe I peed too much on the stick? I should have bought a more reputable brand. I just WANT to see a blue line that's why I'm seeing it. I called a friend to discuss the insanity. Could I really be pregnant?? Called friend. Friend remained neutral and encouraged me to call the Dr's office. Waited 3 hours for the nurse at the Dr.'s office to call me back. Explained the situation. Nurse scheduled a blood draw immediately. Jumped back in my frozen car and got some blood drawn. Waited. Work finally ended. Husband was running errands after work, I had calling hours to attend. Before calling hours I went to a different drug store and bought a more reputable test. Box of 3. Cool. Used the drug store's single stall bathroom. One pink line...another pink line...2 PINK LINES!! NO WAY!!! I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS. I AM PREGNANT!!! How was I going to tell my husband? I bought a blank card with a baby on the front. I started writing a Dear Daddy note. I tore it up. I stuck the test into the card's envelope, sealed it, and wrote on the front. "Our Quest is over!" Placed envelope in purse. After calling hours I called B. as planned. He had just got home and said he would just wait in the garage for me to get home. I pulled in the garage, pulled out the envelope, tore it open and threw just the test in my purse. I jumped in his car. We were off to eat somewhere. I suggested Olive Garden (for sentimental purposes) The next 5-10 minutes went like this:


B: "I have some good news."



Me: "Really?" "Me too."



B: "You go first."


Me: "No, you go first you brought it up."


(husband proceeds to tell me more good news about our house and the possibility of our first offer this weekend.)


B: "OK, you go."


(I turn on interior light of car and pull out the pregnancy test)


Me: "Two pink lines!!!"


(B. goes left of center a bit as he leans forward to get a better look)


B: "WHAT??" (with a smile)


(I proceed with tears to tell him that we are pregnant. I show him the first test. He can't believe it. He laughs, he smiles. We are both amazed, excited, and so incredibly thankful for this miracle.)

God...is able to do far more than we would ever dare to ask or even dream of-infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires, thoughts or hopes.

Ephesians 3:20 TLB

Two Wolves

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a war that goes
on inside people. He said, "My son, the battle is between two "wolves" inside
us all.
One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance,
self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness,
benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather:
"Which wolf wins?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

(unknown author)

Galatians 5:16 ...walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do.

For real?

The setting: Chinese restaurant right down the street.
Characters: Me, my quiet husband, and ignorant middle-aged server.

*After just finishing our warm, satisfying won-ton soup, I sit back in a comfortable position, hands resting on my stomach. Server approaches to take away our soup bowls and looks at me with a smile.

Server: "Are you expecting?"

Me: (takes hands off distended stomach and sits up straight) "No, just bloated."

Server: (big cheesy grin like she knows something we obviously don't) "When are you due?" "My daughter is having a baby in April."

Me: (face turning red, I look at husband whose face is already a rosy shade) "Really, I'm just bloated." (My husband and I proceed to look at each other and laugh b/c we can't believe this is really happening-bad idea, now server thinks we are kidding about not being pregnant.)

Server: (walks away with a laugh and brings our tea to the table with a smile and looks at me) "Stinker!" (she really DOESN'T believe me.)

Me: (embarrassed, mad, thinking of all the things I could say like: "Are you going to ask my husband if he's pregnant too?" "I wonder what your stomach would look like after 4 days of not crapping." "I have a medical condition." "You know, that is a really cruel thing to ask an infertile woman, who would love nothing more than to answer you with a resounding "Why, yes I am!! " "You know, you should NEVER ask a woman if she is pregnant unless you see a baby dropping out of her vagina!!"

*The meal ends and I decide to be a "Grace-dispenser" and say none of the above to the server. Server brings our check and boxed food.

Server: (looks are me with a softened smirk) "Hope your stomach feels better."

Me: "Thanks"

*The one good thing about the 2nd most embarrassing moment of my life-the fortune.

"Focus on your long-term goal. Good things will soon happen. "

Random

After reading my friend's recent post, I decided to be a copy cat and jot down some random facts about myself. Okay, here goes.

• I looked Asian and smiled for my very first photo shoot at the hospital.




• I beat 3 boys in a big wheel competition at age 10.




• I used to have golden blond hair.




• My hair was straight until the 8th grade (I actually prayed for curly hair!)




• I named my first cabbage patch Jonathan Scott.




• I accepted Christ at age 8 and was baptized at age 12 (on my dad's birthday)




• I had Michael Jordan posters all over my room in high school.




• I had my basketball and volleyball number shaved in the back of my lower head in high school #20 (cool, right?)




• I met my husband via my mother in law.




• I have had vivid dreams of giving birth and chasing my toddler around.




• The doc tells me I have a 3%-5% chance of natural conception each month.




• I usually look at dessert menus first.




• I am a late bloomer




• Brian and I had our first date at Olive Garden




• One of my New Year's resolutions is to make a better effort at "feeding the Spirt and starving the flesh".